This is not an issue unique to Borderline Personality Disorder - this happens in all types of relationship - and we often do it, too.The concepts of "not invalidating people" and the concept of "being validating" are really easy to grasp, intellectually.If you're like most people, you probably feel that you are quite adept at validating others. We all know how to validate someone with whom we agree.However, where validation skills are most valuable is in dealing with situations where we disagree or are in conflict with someone.In practice, however, many of us fumble with this life skill.Invalidation is often very subtle - we don't even realize we are doing it.
If we can't be true and authentic, we are sacrificing ourselves for the benefit of another, and we are most likely enabling another person's dysfunction. For these reasons, validation is never about lying, it is not about being ruled by the emotions of others, and it is not letting people "walk all over us". Validating someone's thoughts, feelings, or beliefs does not necessarily mean we agree, overall, with what they are thinking, or feeling, or with their behavior. An ideal target is one that is close to the other person's emotional epicenter.
It can be as simple as negative body language, a look or not saying something when one would expect something to be said.
Validation, on the other hand, is not mindless submission to another person.
Any thoughts or any other way to overcome this problem ?
Thanks, Siraj [ April 23, 2008: Message edited by: Sira j Uddin ] No, Having multiple session open in the same browser is not possible. In IE6 they were opening multiple browser to update their customers details parallelly, there were no complaints.